A Step Toward Becoming

“My fear wants me to stop, because my fear wants me to be safe…My fear wants me to live a smaller life … fear mistakes creativity and inspiration for saber-toothed tigers and wolf packs. They aren’t. Creativity and inspiration are the vehicles that will transport you to the person you most need to become.” (E. Gilbert)

Today, I am afraid.

I’m presenting for the first time at a conference about my PhD research, which is fear-inducing enough for me. But, what is adding more logs to the fear fire is that the nature of my presentation is bringing in something very personal.

Without getting too detailed here, I am attempting to convey how my academic work is holding hands with my personal approach to the natural world. This presentation is pointing to the work and writing I want to do in the future (which fundamentally involves writing words that nudges others to get outdoors, and aims to facilitate a meaningful encounter with wilderness).

I have a hard time believing that what I think and have to say has any resonance in the hearts of others. This is NOT an attempt to fish for a compliment, but I’m sharing this perspective of myself because I suspect many others might suffer from this same symptom of fear. It is terrifying to put bits of your soul out there in any sort of creativity – even something as basic as a presentation. I’m doing that in a few hours, in effort to move towards (as E. Gilbert says) ‘the person I most need to become’.

May you also embrace fear and do the same today.